A few days ago, I had an ah-ha moment that shook me to my core. During a writer’s workshop I attended, one of the speakers presented a perspective that literally took me aback. She said, “Self-abandonment for the sake of others isn’t heroic. It’s self-betrayal.”
I sat stunned. Goosebumps made my limbs shiver, and I knew I had just heard something so transformational that I would never be the same.
The new several hours were a blur. I found myself daydreaming about all of the ways I’ve abandoned myself for the sake of others — to please them, “save” them, or put my needs aside to tend to theirs.
And that revelation brought me to this post on how to navigate life when you’re feeling confused about what to do. Because after I heard those words and allowed them to penetrate the depths of my soul, I felt confused and uncertain about what to do next.
I’ve always been an action-oriented kinda person, so rather than sit around feeling overwhelmed, I made a list and took action. And I wanted to share my list with you, as I found it to be personally helpful, in case you also need some guidance when it comes to navigating your life.
Ready to dive in? Let’s do this! (Don’t worry, I’ll be virtually holding your hand the entire time.)
Here are the 7 tips that will help you navigate life when you’re feeling confused:"Courage is the power to let go of the familiar." Click To Tweet
1.) Explore ALL of your interests
All of us are born with a multitude of interests, and generally speaking, our interests grow and change as we grow and change.
But, many times we feel pressure from outside sources, family, and society at large, to pick a singular interest (or a few at most) and explore those things. While this advice may be well-intended, it’s limiting and won’t serve your expansion and growth.
Rather than limiting yourself, instead, allow yourself to explore *everything* you’re interested in (and YES, I mean EVERYTHING).
Want to take a cooking class? Sign up!
Curious about Egyptian history? Read up and educate yourself.
Want to learn how to ballroom dance? Take lessons.
Remember, any time and money you spend on educating yourself, expanding your awareness, and exploring your interests is time and money well spent. You will never regret taking those classes, learning a new skill, or uncovering new passions. Plus, by exploring your interests you’ll gain a better understanding of how to navigate your life with clarity and purpose!
2.) Don’t Bucket Yourself
“What do you want to be when you grow up?”
From an early age, we’re asked this question and pressured to answer it. It’s as if we’re being pushed into a corner when we’re young, and made to stay in that corner throughout life. But, there’s a whole world out there, and if we only stay in one corner, how we will ever live and experience it?
Don’t bucket yourself into one category. Instead, allow yourself to explore each corner of the room…and the world.
3.) Take advice with a grain of salt
As you navigate life, you’ll receive a lot of advice about what you should believe, how you should live, what kind of career path you should follow, and who you should become.
So many “shoulds”.
And look, most of this advice will come from well-intended people who really have your best interest at heart. But, almost all advice comes from the personal vantage point, meaning people will only offer insights based on their own beliefs, fears, and doubts.
As such, it’s very important as you move through your life to take advice with a grain of salt. Don’t let what other people think of you or say about you ruin your day or determine how you’ll navigate life.
You’re the captain of this cruise ship, and as such, you’re the person who’s meant to steer it towards its destination.
4.) Create Your Own Beliefs
Your beliefs impact every facet of your life from the thoughts you think, to the feelings you feel, to the actions you do or don’t take. When you believe you’re powerful and capable, the world becomes a masterpiece of your making. In contrast, when you believe you’re limited, and life is unfair, then the world becomes a scary, fearful place where every day is a challenge.
Today you are being called to take inventory of your beliefs. Are your beliefs:
Uplifting or defeating?
Empowering or disempowering?
Limiting or limitless?
If your system of beliefs limit you in any way or hold you back from living the life of your choosing, then they aren’t serving you and it’s time to ditch them in favor of new, empowering beliefs.
5.) Read, read, read!
The stories, ideas, and inspirations other people share with the world are special gifts that can offer us hope, insight, and wisdom when navigating our own lives.
As such, when you’re feeling confused about your purpose or the next steps in your life, make it a point to read as often as you can.
Choose books, articles, and stories that are interesting and inspirational to you. Learn about what other people have done to get to where you want to be. Over time, you’ll experience a series of small “ah-ha moments” that will bring you closer to your next step.
6.) Resist choosing the “safe” path
Comfort is defined as, “a state of physical ease and freedom from pain or constraint.”
Essentially, it’s a state of being we all seek out to feel secure. We don’t want to feel fearful of the unknown, so we don’t follow our dreams. We stop exploring our interests. And we settle for what is rather than what could be.
We get stuck working at jobs we don’t care about.
We stay in relationships that aren’t healthy.
We do the same thing every day because we’re afraid of change.
And when we do this, we miss out on life and everything it has to offer.
Resist the temptation to choose the safe path. It might be crowded and well-lit, but that doesn’t mean it’s the right path for YOU.
Dare to live your dreams, and light your own path. Follow the road that’s paved just for you…and allow yourself to experience all of the ebbs and flows along the way.
7.) Ask for Help
When it comes to navigating life, many times we feel like we have to do it alone. We’re too afraid or ashamed to admit we need help, so we try to do everything ourselves. And when we do this, we deny ourselves the support, love, and TLC that our mind-body-soul needs.
To illustrate this point, consider the following story:A little boy was having difficulty lifting a heavy stone. His father came along just then. Noting the boy's failure, he asked, "Are you sure you're using all your strength?""Yes, I am," the little boy said impatiently.""No, you are… Click To Tweet
A little boy was having difficulty lifting a heavy stone. His father came along just then. Noting the boy’s failure, he asked, “Are you sure you’re using all your strength?”
“Yes, I am,” the little boy said impatiently.”
“No, you are not,” the father answered. “I am right here just waiting, and you haven’t asked me to help you.”
Don’t be like this little boy when it comes to navigating your life. Be open and willing to ask for help when you need it. There are more than 8 BILLION people walking this planet right now. You’re never alone, and help is always there when you need it. Remember that.
About Antasha Durbin: Antasha is a spiritual writer and life-long student of the universe. Her website, cajspirituality.com, is dedicated to simplifying the spiritual experience and making it attainable for everyone. Follow her for free, easy-to-digest, and highly actionable advice on spirituality, mindfulness, and empowered living.