Want to Be Happy? Then You Need to Change Your Perspective…Here’s How:

5 Reasons You Need to Change Your Perspective If You Want to Be Happy
(📷: Karl Fredrickson)

If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” -Dr. Wayne Dyer

A waterfall of sunshine poured in through my barren bedroom windows. The new day’s brightness made its way onto my make-shift bed, and in an attempt to escape its rays, I switched sides. But, my partially deflated airbed couldn’t hold the weight of my rotation, and my face ended up halfway on the ground.

The smell of wet, rotting cardboard permeated the air around me, and my belongings (or what was left of them) were sloppily smashed within the confines of the deteriorating boxes.

The feeling of overwhelm consumed me, and I quickly turned my attention to self-defeating thoughts:

“I have nothing.”

“Life is so unfair.”

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“Why does it have to be this hard?”

I was stressed about finances, work and life in general. After coming out of a bad relationship, I didn’t know where or how to begin to reorganize myself and my life. The end of the month was looming, and I didn’t have anywhere near the amount of money needed to cover that month’s rent. And even though I was babysitting, dog-walking and cocktail waitressing part-time, I still wasn’t making enough money to make ends meet.

Just when I thought I’d wallow in self-pity forever, the doorbell rang. I rolled out of my airbed and onto the ground like a hungover frat boy and slowly picked myself up. My entire body ached from yet another night of terrible sleep.

I opened the door and a FedEx delivery man handed me a package — it was from my grandfather. He loved sending me get rich quick books (that I’d usually discard), and would sometimes send money too. I tore through the package in a hurry hoping for money, but instead found a book titled The Secret and a note that read:

Dear Tog, this book has changed my life. I know it will change yours too. All of the power you need rests within the thoughts you think. Love, Mumpa

Oh brother,” I thought as I rolled my eyes. “What a load of crap.”

But, I had several hours to spare before my waitressing shift was set to start, and nothing better to do, so I opened the book and started skimming its pages:

“There is no such thing as a hopeless situation. Every single circumstance of your life can change!”

“Whenever you think you can or think you can’t, either way you are right.”

“It is impossible to bring more into your life if you are feeling ungrateful about what you have. Why? Because the thoughts and feelings you emit as you feel ungrateful are all negative emotions. ”

“A person who sets his or her mind on the dark side of life, who lives over and over the misfortunes and disappointments of the past, prays for similar misfortunes and disappointments in the future. If you will see nothing but ill luck in the future, you are praying for such ill luck and will surely get it.”

Looking around at my tattered belongings and life, I gasped and said, “What?! There is NO way I am creating this! Who would create this life if they had the choice??

I shook my head in disbelief and came close to throwing the book out of my bedroom window. But, then I came upon a section detailing the power of visualization and how it enables you to get what you want the most. 

I went from being irritated to being intrigued, and I began to wonder, “What if this IS real? Antasha, what do you have to lose by allowing yourself to believe in this, and maybe (just maybe), benefiting from it?

I decided I had nothing to lose by opening myself up and testing it out. If I was really in control of changing my life, I wanted proof. So I sat down and called out to whoever or whatever was listening, “I am ready for a positive change in my life. Sometime within the next 24 hours, I want to find money. I don’t care where. I don’t care how much. I just want to find money so I know this is real.

I imagined myself holding crisp bills in my hands and breathing in the smell of money. I imagined being surprised at how unexpected my finding was, and the joy that would come from getting exactly what I asked for. After a few minutes of sitting in this state of openness, I got up to get ready for work. On my way to work, I repeated that visualization and request and then turned my attention to my shift and customers. 

By the end of the night I was exhausted, and anxious to get to bed. But, rather than taking my usual route home, I felt like I needed to take a different route, so I did. A few minutes before I got to my apartment building, I saw a small wad of cash sitting directly under a bright streetlight like it was waiting for me to discover it. No one else was around, so I picked it up in disbelief and immediately (recalling the book and my request) said, “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” It was $60, and my first experience with conscious creation.

Goosebumps made their way up and down my arms and legs and I knew something magical had just occurred. 

That experience opened my eyes to the incredible power of perception. As Dr. Wayne Dyer once said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” And he was absolutely right. Once I shifted my perception from looking at everything that was wrong with my life, to looking at and asking for what I wanted, my life changed dramatically — and it all started by finding that $60 on the ground. The more I practiced shifting my perspective, the better my life became. Suddenly I was working more than enough shifts to cover my expenses, my customer tips increased, and I was able to save and stop working other odd jobs.

With time I realized I could have whatever I wanted, and you can too — only you don’t need to spend years studying this stuff, or waiting for someone to send you a book. Instead, you can use these 5 tips to shift your perception right now and take back control of your life.  

Here’s how:

1.) Open Your Heart and Mind 

5 Reasons You Need to Change Your Perspective If You Want to Be Happy

📷Chaz McGregor

Many of us are taught from a young age that life isn’t fair. We’re taught things are the way they are and nothing can be done about it. But this simply isn’t true — life is constantly moving, constantly changing directions, and in order to get unstuck from where we don’t want to be, we have to first open our hearts and minds to alternative possibilities. 

For me, conscious creation started when my grandfather sent me that book. Prior to that, I was looked at my life from a perspective of lack and complained about everything I didn’t have, and how bad things were. Once I opened my heart and mind to new “what ifs,” and was able to validate what I’d read, things began to get better immediately.  

Rather than looking at your current situation as an imprisonment and making note of everything you don’t have, or all of the experiences you don’t want, instead use the wisdom and learning from those experiences to discover what you do want and then ASK for it. Open your mind to the limitless possibilities of the universe, and open your heart and be willing to receive them. 

2.) Kiss Self-Defeating Comparisons Goodbye

5 Reasons You Need to Change Your Perspective If You Want to Be Happy
5 Reasons You Need to Change Your Perspective If You Want to Be Happy
📷: William Stitt

“He is more successful than me.”

“She has more (insert thing) than me.”

“I can’t have that because only people like (insert excuse here) get it.”

Self-defeating comparisons are the bane of positive perception because they train your mind to view the world as something that is limited, when in fact it isn’t. And if you don’t believe me, take a look around you right now — everything inside of your home, every building, road, car and invention once lived as an idea in someone’s mind. And the only thing that separates “them” from “you” is your belief — caused by your perception of the world.

I used to compare myself, and my lack, to other people and what they had. When I did this I would feel envious of the seeming ease they had in their lives, and upset at how difficult things were for me. These comparisons just made me unhappy, and unmotivated to do something to change where I was. When I stopped focusing on them versus me, I was able to gain clarity in what I wanted, and you can do the same. 

The minute you choose to let go of self-defeating comparisons, which serve no purpose other than to bring you down and make you feel validated in your unhappy state, is the minute you start to change your life for the better.

3.) Start Seeing Yourself as Worthy


📷: Itay Kabalo

“I’m not good enough.”

“There’s nothing special about me.”

“I’m just (insert excuse here).”

These phrases and others similar to them used to be part of my daily dialogue, and because I believed them, they were true for that period of time in my life. But, when my perception started to shift, and I realized they didn’t have to be true anymore, I could change them at any time and create a new reality for myself. 

The truth is, the only limits we have are the ones we impose upon ourselves, and if we always see ourselves as unworthy, then we will always be seen by others and the universe as unworthy too. And considering we’re all spiritual beings put on this earth to bring our thoughts into physical manifestation, there isn’t a soul vibrating that’s unworthy.

Let go of your limiting thoughts and beliefs about what you “can’t do” and focus instead on what you want to do.

4.) Let Go of Your Fear-Based Paralysis


📷: Vladislav Muslakov

“I’ll never make it.”

“What if I fail?”

“What will other people think?”

Fear is an instinct we were given to help us survive as a species, it wasn’t something that was meant to be used as a deterrent to creating. Fear strips the excitement we feel when we come up with a new idea/opportunity/creation and replaces it with doubt, disbelief and negative thinking.

In order to shift your perception and step into a state of conscious manifestation (aka creating the life you want), you need to let go of your fear-based paralysis.

This means when you have a great idea that excites you, ALLOW yourself to visualize it coming to life. Believe it can happen. And then take any inspired action necessary to bring it into fruition — sign up for that class you’re curious about, start writing that book you’ve always talked about publishing, create a vision board of what you want and believe you can have everything on it. 

I did this with the $60 I found — I knew I wanted to find money, and the idea that it would come to me on its own in an unexpected way excited me. I visualized myself holding it, and opened myself up to the belief that it would come to me. And then one my way home I was inspired to take a new route home, and that’s when I found the money. 

Have fun and be creative! Life is meant to be joyful! 

5.) Stop Complaining About Other People’s Successes and Start Making Your Own

5 Reasons You Need to Change Your Perspective If You Want to Be Happy

📷: Kyle Broad

He only got that job because he knows (insert person).”

“She only has money because she married rich.”

“(insert person) only has what they have because of their parents.”

When you complain about what other people have, and assume you know all of the details of how they got to where they’re at, the only thing you’re doing is hold yourself back. If you shift your perception, and stop seeing the accomplishments of others as something out of reach for you, and instead use them as INSPIRATION to figure out what success is to YOU.

After my first experience with conscious manifestation, I started looking around at others and picking out things I appreciated about them — whether they were personality traits, material possessions or accomplishments, and saying, “I like that about (insert person). I want something similar in my life.” My openness and belief allowed me to draw those things I admired about others into my life as well. 

So the next time you find yourself complaining about what someone else has, stop yourself and instead ask yourself, “what does (insert person) have that I’d want?” and “Why do I want that?” and “What is success to me?

When you’re able to answer these questions for yourself, you’ll be on your way to figuring out exactly what it is that YOU want to get out of YOUR life, and the universe will have your back. 

5 Reasons You Need to Change Your Perspective If You Want to Be Happy

📷: Jenn Evelyn Ann

Perception is a powerful thing — it has the ability to show us the best in ourselves, others and circumstances, or show us the worst. We get what we look for, focus on and believe in — and most of us do this unconsciously because we aren’t aware that we’re in control, but we are. So, today you have a choice to make, are you ready to harness the power of your perception and take back control of your life?



Screen Shot 2017-12-15 at 10.38.26 AM.png About Antasha Durbin: Antasha is a spiritual writer, life-long student of the universe, and psychic tarot card reader. Her website, cajspirituality.com, is dedicated to casualizing the spiritual experience and making it attainable for anyone, anywhere, anytime. Follow her for free, easy-to-digest and highly actionable advice on spirituality, mindfulness and empowered living.



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