“Love means partnership, not ownership, appreciation, not possession.” – Unknown
When it comes to maintaining a loving, romantic partnership in today’s world, the odds feel invariably stacked against us.
For one thing, there are so many distractions that tear us away from each other — social media, TV, video games, work, social events etc. — and a lot of the time, we don’t even realize we’re being pulled apart.
What’s more — when things aren’t going well, it’s so easy to walk away. After all, we have access to an abundance of free dating apps at our fingertips. Our next “match” is only a few swipes or taps away.
So what’s the secret to maintaining a sizzling, loving relationship that will excite you now and in the future?
The secret is simple: stay consciously connected to your partner.
I know what you’re thinking (and I see you rolling your eyes), “Sure, that sounds simple but it’s easier said than done.”
Here’s the catch — I said consciously, meaning every single day you take time to be with your partner and show that person they’re important to you. And yes, you have time! In as little as 20 minutes a day, you can give your partner the gift of uninterrupted connection and time.
1.) Start each day with these words: “I love you.”
You’re an energetic being living in a multi-dimensional, energetic world. The energy (thoughts, words, actions) you put out into the world will be the energy that boomerangs back to you.
That being said, if you want a vibrant, happy, loving relationship then you need to put out a vibrant, happy loving energy!
And it’s easy to do! When you open your eyes in the morning, rather than checking your phone right away (the ONLY exception to this is if you don’t live with your partner or they’re away then you can use your phone to message “I love you” to them) or darting to the bathroom, take a moment to cuddle your partner and say, “I love you.”
These powerful words will start your day, and your partner’s day on a loving note!
2.) Do something nice (and unexpected) for your partner every day
Regardless if you’ve been together for 5 months, or married for 40 years, you should never stop courting your partner.
Every day, take some time to do something nice for your partner.
If you don’t know what to do, here are some ideas:
- write your partner a love note
- surprise your partner with their favorite food for dinner
- wake up early and cook your partner breakfast
- plan a surprise night out to their favorite place
- prepare a relaxing bath when they get home from work
- help them run an errand they haven’t gotten to
These gestures, regardless of how small they seem or how busy you are, will reinforce your love and dedication to your partner and keep your relationship strong.
3.) Always let your partner know you appreciate them
One of the most common complaints people in long-term relationships have is, “my partner doesn’t appreciate me, or anything I do!”
And it’s no wonder — all of us have been guilty at one point or another of taking everything our partner does for us for granted.
Usually, this doesn’t happen on purpose. It’s just when you’re with someone for a long time, it’s easy to overlook the things they do or forget altogether.
But, when people don’t feel appreciated, they become resentful. Lack of appreciation is often the root of discord between a lot of couples. Luckily, it’s easy to avoid. Take time every day to tell your partner at least 3 things they’ve done that day that you appreciate.
Here’s an example:
- Thank you for taking care of the kids today, I know it’s not easy to manage them on your own
- Thank you for going grocery shopping for us so we have food to eat
- Thank you for making me coffee this morning
By acknowledging your partner, and saying thank you every day, your partner will never question whether or not you appreciate them, and enjoy doing things for you.
4.) Meditate Together Every Night Before Bed
Not only is meditation proven to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression (because it releases dopamine in your brain, also known as “the happy hormone“) it will also significantly improve your relationship if practiced regularly.
Here’s why: meditation allows you to quiet your mind, let go of stresses and fully connect with yourself and the world around you. By spending 10 to 20 minutes every night meditating together, you and your partner will both become fully immersed in the present moment, at the same time!
What’s more — the two of you will be able to go to bed at night relaxed, connected and in a state of gratitude for each other and life.
If you’re unsure of how to get started, try the Connect Series by Agape, it’s a guided meditation series designed specifically for couples and it focuses on harnessing communication, connectivity, free expression, and reflection. (Sign up now and get 50% off of your subscription! Use the code CAJ50).
Use these 4 suggestions to stay consciously connected to your partner, and enjoy a healthy, vibrant, loving relationship!
About Antasha Durbin: Antasha is a spiritual writer, life-long student of the universe, and psychic tarot card reader. Her website, cajspirituality.com, is dedicated to casualizing the spiritual experience and making it attainable for anyone, anywhere, anytime. Follow her for free, easy-to-digest and highly actionable advice on spirituality, mindfulness and empowered living.