“You are only one decision away from a totally different life.”
Every day we make hundreds of small choices. We choose when we’ll wake up. We choose what we’ll eat. We choose what we’ll wear. We choose how we’ll start our day.
The list goes on and on. And the little decisions we make, as insignificant as they may seem, are actually important because they make up the bulk of our days, and therefore our lives.
That’s why we have to be conscious of our choices because they impact us and the people around us.
Before you make another decision in your life, ask yourself these two questions:
1.) What will the consequences of this decision have on my life?
It’s 6:30 am on Monday morning and your alarm is going off. You’ve made a commitment to yourself to wake up half an hour earlier than usual so you can start working out because you want to be healthier.
But rather than waking up, you hit snooze. “I’ll start tomorrow,” you rationalize to yourself. Tomorrow comes, and you do the same thing. The next day, you hit snooze again. By the end of the week, you’ve given up your commitment to be healthier and work out in the morning.
That one decision to hit snooze and to not wake up may have lasting impacts on your health and wellness for the rest of your life.
But, let’s rewind. Let’s pretend we’re transported back to the time when your alarm goes off. Beep. Beep. Beep. You’re tired, and you desperately want to hit snooze, but before you do you take a second to ask yourself, “What will the consequences of me hitting snooze be?”
Then you list off the consequences of hitting soon:
- I’ll sleep in
- I won’t work out
- I won’t honor the commitment I made to myself
- I will lose motivation
- I might do the same thing tomorrow
- I won’t reach my goals
Knowing your goals are important, and so is your health, you make the decision not to hit snooze and instead decide to get out of bed. You work out and feel great all day. The next day, you work out again. Before you know it, working out is part of your daily routine and you wake up feeling energized, healthy and excited to start your day!
Your decisions matter. They’re the indicators of where you’ll be tomorrow and the next day. Before you make another decision, make sure to start by asking yourself this question and then weighing the consequences.
2.) Will this decision I’m making now bring me and everyone impacted by it happiness?
Imagine you’re in a fight with your sister, and because you’re angry with her, you yell at her, tell her you hate her and start nitpicking everything you “don’t like” about her. It doesn’t take long for her to run away in tears, and after you have some time to reflect you end up feeling really bad for how you treated her.
You wish you could take back all of the things you said, but you can’t.
You wish you could take back the hurt you brought to her, but you can’t.
At this point, the only thing you can do is apologize for what you’ve said and wait for her to accept your apology.
But, what if instead of acting impulsively or out of negative emotions, you instead asked yourself: “Will yelling at my sister, telling her I hate her and shouting hurtful comments bring happiness to me or her?”
The answer is no.
And by asking yourself this question first, the entire situation would have unfolded differently because you would have made a better decision instead — such as leaving the room to cool down, or reflecting on what you were about to say before saying it.
That’s why this question matters, and you should ask it before you make any decision that could negatively impact you or anyone around you.
Use these two questions as a frame of reference before making any decisions and you’ll live a happier, more fulfilled life!
Xx,
Antasha
About Antasha Durbin: Antasha is a spiritual writer, life-long student of the universe, and psychic tarot card reader. Her website, cajspirituality.com, is dedicated to casualizing the spiritual experience and making it attainable for anyone, anywhere, anytime. Follow her for free, easy-to-digest and highly actionable advice on spirituality, mindfulness and empowered living.
Isn't it time you started living the life you've always imagined?
As always, your advice is exactly what I needed to hear today. (I thank the universe for reaching me through you!) For months, I’ve committed to the same few things to start on that Monday: I will go to yoga. I will go to Toastmasters. I will write x number of hours every day. I will not obsessivley search twitter for political updates.
What I’ve found out is that even if life doesn’t throw excuses in my path (people visiting, kid issues), I will throw things in my own path subconsciously. When faced with going to yoga, I will suddenly need to finish laundry or call a friend. Or it will be too hot out, or too cold. Or it might rain. You get the picture ….
I’m going to try out your advice. I’ll let you know how it goes. (And just think — Your blog is affecting decisions made by people you’ve never met!)
Thank you, Antasha! 💕
Shawna, so lovely to hear from you! As always, your beautiful and thoughtful comments make my day!
Please keep me posted on how things go for you once you put these questions into action. I’ve been using them, and it makes a world of difference especially when approaching emotionally sensitive topics involving someone else and motivating yourself to stay aligned with your goals.
Sending you lots of love! Xx
Antasha
What I think really works about this is that it takes the ego out of the driver’s seat. The ego totally justifies anger and any actions that come from it. It is thin-skinned and doesn’t care how its actions affect other people. So even though your questions are deceptively simply, they involve a total switch of who is in charge of the situation.
I’ve been able to use it several times a day, believe it or not. Thank you, Antasha!