When Your Dreams Take Longer Than Expected to Bloom

(📷: Ravi Roshan)

You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestation of your own blessings.” –Elizabeth Gilbert 

Imagine that your dream is a tiny seed that, if properly nurtured, will grow into a big, beautiful apple tree.

In the beginning, you hold the seed in the palm of your hand and you can clearly visualize yourself taking shade from the hot sun in the middle of August under its branches. You can feel yourself curling up against its rough trunk with the smell of earth beneath you. As you sit there with a book in one hand, and a crisp apple in the other, you take a deep breath and feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude, pride and accomplishment.

You close your hand, and bring the protected seed up to your heart. Your belief is strong, and you’re ready to begin the process of turning your seed into a tree. So you create a plan of action to best nurture that future tree.

At first, your plan excites you and you quickly find the “perfect place” to plant your seed. Your chosen spot gets just the right amount of sun, is easily accessible so you can water it as needed, and is sheltered from the majority of pests.

I’ve got this!” You think confidently.

And for the first few weeks you do! You nurture your seed diligently, and much to your delight it begins sprouting. But, after a few more weeks not much changes — at least not visibly — and you become disheartened:

“Why is this taking so long?”

“Maybe I should just give up.”

“Surely, I’ve done something wrong. This tree isn’t growing as quickly as it should.”

An overwhelming sense of disappointment sets in. You sincerely wonder how you could’ve ever been so disillusioned as to think you could successfully grow a tree. And as doubt sets in, you stop nurturing your sprouting tree and stop waiting for it to grow.

But, what you didn’t see during that time was the growth happening beneath the soil. Your nurturing was never in vain, instead that entire time your sprouting tree was expanding its roots, taking hold of the earth around itself and creating a firm foundation so no matter how big it became, it could always support itself.

And when you walked away from your plant, you also walked away from its chance of becoming a tree. You stopped believing in it because it wasn’t manifesting according to your timeline and how you imagined it would.

For many of us, we treat our dreams and goals like that seed. At first, we nurture them, we believe in them, and we take action to bring them into fruition. But, when things don’t go according to OUR plans, or OUR timeline, we lose faith and we give up.

But, what if we shift our perspective and consciously decide to focus on building momentum rather than solely obsessing over the outcome?

If we can train ourselves to always focus on the momentum rather than just the outcome, the manifestation of our dreams will be inevitable. Yes, it might not happen according to OUR plan. Yes, it might not be instantaneous. But it WILL happen.

1.) Get Rid of Self-defeating “Why” Questions

“Why isn’t this happening fast enough!?”

“Why is this so hard?!”

“Why can’t I get this to work?!”

These questions are negative and unnecessary. They create pressure to find an answer — and often times that answer is impossible to know or define.

Rather than focusing on self-defeating “why” questions, instead focus on asking yourself what actions you can take to manifest your dreams into physical reality.

Here’s an example of how you could do that:

Change the question, “why isn’t this happening fast enough!?” to “What action(s) can I take right now to keep the momentum I’ve built up so far going?

Remember Newton’s first law of motion: “An object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion with the same speed and in the same direction UNLESS acted upon by an unbalanced force.” The only way for you to continue bringing your dreams into this physical space is by continuing to work TOWARD them! If you stop prematurely, your manifestations will follow suit.

If we can train ourselves to always focus on the momentum rather than just the outcome, the manifestation of our dreams will be inevitable. Yes, it might not happen according to OUR plan. Yes, it might not be instantaneous. But it WILL happen.

2.) List Your M/T/W/T/F/S/S Action Items!

It’s not enough to acknowledge what actions need to be taken to keep the momentum going, we actually have to take them! I know, I know — this is easier said than done. But, if we wait around for inspiration/motivation to hit, we might be waiting forever.

So make an actionable, weekly list every single week.

Write down in detail everything you’re going to accomplish TODAY, tomorrow AND the rest of the week . For each day choose three realistic actions you can complete and commit to. Here’s an example of my Monday list for this website:


1.) Write a new blog piece

2.) Publish content to social media platforms (Twitter, Facebook & IG) and continue building and engaging with audience

3.) Find one new avenue to promote website (syndicated blog post, guest post etc.)

Use this structure for the entire week. As you complete each action item, mark it off of your list.

This list will do two things:

1.) Keep you organized and keep your momentum going

2.) Serve as tangible proof that things ARE getting done and ARE moving forward even if it doesn’t always feel like it.

3.) Let go of the Need to Control Everything

For many of us, we get so caught up in controlling all of the details including how we think things should happen and when we think they should happen, that sometimes we actually block our manifestations from happening.

When things don’t go our way, or according to our plan, we may lose hope and give up on our dreams. But this is when we remind must remind ourselves that there’s OUR plan, and then there’s the UNIVERSE’S plan.

Instead of obsessing over all of the details (after all, the hows are the domain of the universe, so let the universe do its thing!) and getting upset when things aren’t flowing in the order we think they should, be open and adaptable to things potentially shifting direction and manifesting in a different way.

Open your mind, and relinquish the need to control everything. Doing so will allow you to fully experience the new ideas and thoughts swirling around you and within you, many of which will lead you to eye-opening actions and inspirations for additional actions you can take to breathe life into your manifestations.

What tree are you planting today and what can you do to keep the momentum going so it grows?



Screen Shot 2017-12-15 at 10.38.26 AM.png About Antasha Durbin: Antasha is a spiritual writer, life-long student of the universe, and psychic tarot card reader. Her website, cajspirituality.com, is dedicated to casualizing the spiritual experience and making it attainable for anyone, anywhere, anytime. Follow her for free, easy-to-digest and highly actionable advice on spirituality, mindfulness and empowered living.

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